obama would’ve jumped from that helicopter
obama would’ve piloted that helicopter and crashed it into the olympic field, only to emerge proud and unscathed from the rubble as an eagle landed on his shoulder
Your both wrong. Obama wouldn’t have jumped from the helicopter since there wouldn’t have been one. He’d have flown to the stadium on a giant bald eagle that he nursed since childhood. Once the eagle reached the stadium, Obama would dismount and slowly float down to the ground, carried only by badassery and patriotism.